Here’s one thing I don’t love hearing though: “You don’t look as happy as you used to.”
OUCH. Major ouch.
I was told this today and it was a little bit of a shock. When you blog about happiness you start to feel like it’s your job to be happy all the time—as you walk, as you eat, heck, even as you sleep. Live, breathe happiness.
The truth is that I’m not as happy lately as I usually am. I should be much more excited for senior year but for some reason I’m really having trouble finding it in me. My boyfriend has been across the country for a month and it’ll be another month until I see him. For this and other reasons, my happiness has found a darn good hiding spot and I’m having trouble finding him.
I guess I just need to decide to seek him out. Right now I’m letting him hide for awhile. I’ll go and get him soon enough. Step one is to stop referring to happiness as a “he.”
So there are a few points I’m trying to make:
1.Don’t say to anyone, “You don’t look as happy as you used to be.” Just don’t. You don’t think they already know that? Thank you for pointing out the obvious. It’s like telling someone they looked like they’ve gained weight. You get the picture.
2. If it’s true that you’re not feeling as happy as you used to be, it may be time to find your happiness in other places. I’m still stuck in the rut of getting happiness from spending time with my boyfriend. Not really possible right now so I need to look elsewhere. There is always happiness to be had, it just may move around as your life does.
3. Don’t give up hope: Just because I’m not my usual happy self doesn’t mean that I’m going to wallow in this. My frame of mind is fleeting and I know brighter days are to come. Just don’t give up this hope because once you do you’ll stop searching for your happiness that eventually wants to be found, sooner rather than later.
So next time you see someone who does seem genuinely happy, compliment them on it. It’s a nice thing to hear. And if someone is looking down in the dumps? Rack your brain for something other than a comment on their happiness. It’s the last thing they want to hear.
The Sunny Girl, Lauren Cook